Sharing Solutions

As my children get older, I sense a shift of parenting approaching. I don't want them to need the direct instruction on what they already know is right. When they were younger, they did need to be told exactly what was expected. That was how they learned... "Share with your sister." "Give your brother a turn."

Now, I really want my oldest children to just know what is the right thing and to internalize it themselves. That way they will gain independence with their choices and not begin to "tune out" a nagging mom (which we all know what eventually happens).

I tried a line the other day when Megan was having a hard time sharing with Lucy. Yes, I could make her share, but what is that really going to teach in the long run? Instead I said, "sharing must come from our hearts or else its not real sharing." Megan looked at me for a split second, returned playing and five minutes later asked Lucy is she would like a turn.

Not sure if it was internalized for eternity, but for once it didn't involve me being the mediator and we all ended up happy.